It is about time that I got around to posting about Cooper's birthday, which was nearly 3 months ago (can I really be that behind?).
We started his celebration at a place called Lollihop, which is an indoor play area. He and his two girlfriends, E and G had a great time. I was amazed at how good he was at climbing and jumping and sliding through all of the play things. He got to play in giant ball pits, ride on a train, drive a little electric car with Papa, climb and crawl through a giant maze, ride a play helicopter, jump on those big blow up bouncy things and on some trampolines as well. Aunt Tina came, too, and I was so happy to have someone else other than my pregnant self there to chase Cooper around. He tasted his first slushy, but wasn't a big fan. So, mom had to finish it for him. These are the sacrifices I am willing to make for my sweet boy! A trip to McDonald's for dinner on the way home was an added treat since there was no chance that Cooper would make it all the way home before falling fast asleep.
The next day, Peter's parents (Oma and Opa), Peter's sister (Aunt Tina), and Peter's Grandmother (Tik Tak Oma) came to our house and we enjoyed some cake and sang Happy Birthday to Cooper again.
Cooper, you are such a joy at 3. We are having a great time being your parents and watching you grow. You are the sweetest, most handsome, and tallest 3 year old we know. We can't even remember what life was like before we had you! We love you so much!
Monday, March 22, 2010
Sunday, March 7, 2010
2 New Accomplishments!
Cooper's timing is always amazing to me. Always at times when I am struggling with his slow development, he suprises me. Last night consisted of 2 new firsts for Cooper.
The first was that he learned to drink from a cup. For some reason he has been afraid to drink from a cup, although he has no problem drinking from a sippy cup, water bottle, or a straw. But he just would not drink out of a cup. Peter decided that he was going to tackle this yesterday and while he held Cooper still, I tilted the cup. Cooper put up quite a fight, and then he realized that what was in the cup is the same apple juice that he always drinks. And that was it. Now he drinks like a big boy. We cheered and clapped for him and gave him gummy bears between sips, and he knew that he was doing something big. He had the sweetest proud smile on his face. In fact, he drank so much enjoying his new skill that Peter decided to move on to the next thing.
Peter put Cooper on the potty right after leaving the dinner table. Cooper has had much experience at this point sitting on the potty, but he has never done anything other than play. But with all the juice, Peter felt that something was bound to come out. And lo and behold, something came out. A great big stinky on the potty! We all cheered and clapped and made a big deal out of it. We talked all about the stinky and then let Cooper flush and wave "Bye, Bye" to the stinky. It was really funny. And earlier today, Peter got Cooper to go "tee tee" on the potty. Potty training will take quite a while with Cooper, but we were happy to have made this big step forward.
And who did it all? Papa did.
The first was that he learned to drink from a cup. For some reason he has been afraid to drink from a cup, although he has no problem drinking from a sippy cup, water bottle, or a straw. But he just would not drink out of a cup. Peter decided that he was going to tackle this yesterday and while he held Cooper still, I tilted the cup. Cooper put up quite a fight, and then he realized that what was in the cup is the same apple juice that he always drinks. And that was it. Now he drinks like a big boy. We cheered and clapped for him and gave him gummy bears between sips, and he knew that he was doing something big. He had the sweetest proud smile on his face. In fact, he drank so much enjoying his new skill that Peter decided to move on to the next thing.
Peter put Cooper on the potty right after leaving the dinner table. Cooper has had much experience at this point sitting on the potty, but he has never done anything other than play. But with all the juice, Peter felt that something was bound to come out. And lo and behold, something came out. A great big stinky on the potty! We all cheered and clapped and made a big deal out of it. We talked all about the stinky and then let Cooper flush and wave "Bye, Bye" to the stinky. It was really funny. And earlier today, Peter got Cooper to go "tee tee" on the potty. Potty training will take quite a while with Cooper, but we were happy to have made this big step forward.
And who did it all? Papa did.
Friday, March 5, 2010
I'm Back
OK, I'm back. I am done with the pity party and have rejoined the real world again. Judging from the butt imprints on the sofa, I would say I have done enough sitting and wallowing in all the unknowns of life.
First off, the results from the clinic. After a lengthy and thorough testing period, the doctors and therapists at the clinic believe that Cooper has autism. I know. It is that "A" word that I didn't want to hear or face. But as we all know at this point, it is not a huge surprise. Just disheartening and yes, it hurts. But I am putting all that aside for the time being because the label doesn't matter. What matters is that we now have lots of options to consider that could help Cooper. And that is what this is all about. Figuring out how best to help Cooper.
I mentioned in the last post that we have a lot of work to do. And although overwhelming at first, we are slowly digesting all the information and sifting through it all to determine what we think is best for Cooper. Here are the main points to come out of this:
1. Even Integrative Kindergarten (with 10 normal kids, 5 kids who need more help, 2 teachers and an assistant) may be too much for Cooper. He could function in a setting with this many kids, but it is questionable if he would be able to filter and focus enough to actually learn. There is another school about 30 minutes away from us with smaller groups, more trained therapists on hand, and specialized therapy opportunities (such as music therapy, swimming, working with animals, etc.) where Cooper could have a better chance at learning all the things he is supposed to learn in Kindergarten and have more therapy integrated. However, this school is even harder to get into and we don't know yet if there are normal kids there as well, which is really important to Peter and I.
2. Cooper could benefit from a type of therapy called ABA Therapy (Applied Behavioral Analysis). This is not very widely offered and we only know of 2 places, both between 45 minutes and an hour away. From what we have seen on the internet, this therapy usually isn't covered by insurance and in the US it can cost upwards of around $20,000 per year, however we don't have any idea what the costs would be in Germany. All we know is that it can be an incredibly beneficial therapy and it is specifically for autism.
3. Since there are no guarantees that Cooper will get a spot in the school mentioned above, we still have to continue in the direction of finding him a spot in an Integrative Kindergarten. There is still much work to be done on this front.
4. We need to seek out a pediatrician that has more experience with kids with autism. This wasn't discussed at the clinic as a necessity, however we do feel that it is important that the physician who treats Cooper be familiar with autism. We spent a lot of time trying to convince our current pediatrician that things weren't right with Cooper, so we would prefer to have a pediatrician that is familiar with different ways of treating Autism.
5. Perhaps the most daunting is this last step. From much research on the internet and also through a discussion that I have recently had with a friend and pediatrician back in the US, it is becoming more and more apparent that Cooper should try a special diet can have a big impact on kids with autism. This consists of three parts. The first being a treatment to rid the body of excess yeast. The second and third parts are to eliminate glutens and dairy from the diet. This is commonly referred to as a gluten free and casein (dairy) free diet or GFCF diet. This pretty much would eliminate EVERYTHING that we currently eat. Glutens are found in wheat, flour, rye, oats, bread, pasta, cereals, cookies, crackers, soups, sauces, seasonings, artificial colors, and candies. Dairy of course consists of any milk from animals (soy milk would be allowed), butter, margarine, yogurt, cheese, and ice cream among many others. From what I have read, people who are on a GFCF diet usually need to take vitamin supplements to ensure that they are getting the calcium and nutrients they need, however many vitamins contain either gluten or dairy so we would need to seek out the right vitamins as well. Cooper would be allowed to have most fruits, vegetables, potatoes, rice, and I am not really sure yet what else. Obviously this will take a lot more research before we are ready to take this on, but all the information leads us to believe that it wouldn't be fair to Cooper not to try. It's just hilarious to think about Peter and I having anything to do with a strict, regimented diet. (STRICT?REGIMENTED? I'm not sure I have ever used those words in my entire life. Certainly not pertaining to food!)
So, you can see how all this has had me wallowing in self-pity on the couch with nothing but glutens, dairy products, and google keeping me company. I just needed a moment. But I am back. I truly believe we can do this, and if nothing else Cooper deserves our best efforts. It feels good to have a game plan and to be moving forward. Sure I have some scary thoughts, and I will share those over time. For now though, I am armed with a mother's love for this wonderful little boy and we will do whatever it takes to give him every opportunity possible.
Now, if you'll excuse me, I think I need to go have a bunch of bread and some ice cream. We have to get rid of this stuff . . . for Cooper, of course! :)
First off, the results from the clinic. After a lengthy and thorough testing period, the doctors and therapists at the clinic believe that Cooper has autism. I know. It is that "A" word that I didn't want to hear or face. But as we all know at this point, it is not a huge surprise. Just disheartening and yes, it hurts. But I am putting all that aside for the time being because the label doesn't matter. What matters is that we now have lots of options to consider that could help Cooper. And that is what this is all about. Figuring out how best to help Cooper.
I mentioned in the last post that we have a lot of work to do. And although overwhelming at first, we are slowly digesting all the information and sifting through it all to determine what we think is best for Cooper. Here are the main points to come out of this:
1. Even Integrative Kindergarten (with 10 normal kids, 5 kids who need more help, 2 teachers and an assistant) may be too much for Cooper. He could function in a setting with this many kids, but it is questionable if he would be able to filter and focus enough to actually learn. There is another school about 30 minutes away from us with smaller groups, more trained therapists on hand, and specialized therapy opportunities (such as music therapy, swimming, working with animals, etc.) where Cooper could have a better chance at learning all the things he is supposed to learn in Kindergarten and have more therapy integrated. However, this school is even harder to get into and we don't know yet if there are normal kids there as well, which is really important to Peter and I.
2. Cooper could benefit from a type of therapy called ABA Therapy (Applied Behavioral Analysis). This is not very widely offered and we only know of 2 places, both between 45 minutes and an hour away. From what we have seen on the internet, this therapy usually isn't covered by insurance and in the US it can cost upwards of around $20,000 per year, however we don't have any idea what the costs would be in Germany. All we know is that it can be an incredibly beneficial therapy and it is specifically for autism.
3. Since there are no guarantees that Cooper will get a spot in the school mentioned above, we still have to continue in the direction of finding him a spot in an Integrative Kindergarten. There is still much work to be done on this front.
4. We need to seek out a pediatrician that has more experience with kids with autism. This wasn't discussed at the clinic as a necessity, however we do feel that it is important that the physician who treats Cooper be familiar with autism. We spent a lot of time trying to convince our current pediatrician that things weren't right with Cooper, so we would prefer to have a pediatrician that is familiar with different ways of treating Autism.
5. Perhaps the most daunting is this last step. From much research on the internet and also through a discussion that I have recently had with a friend and pediatrician back in the US, it is becoming more and more apparent that Cooper should try a special diet can have a big impact on kids with autism. This consists of three parts. The first being a treatment to rid the body of excess yeast. The second and third parts are to eliminate glutens and dairy from the diet. This is commonly referred to as a gluten free and casein (dairy) free diet or GFCF diet. This pretty much would eliminate EVERYTHING that we currently eat. Glutens are found in wheat, flour, rye, oats, bread, pasta, cereals, cookies, crackers, soups, sauces, seasonings, artificial colors, and candies. Dairy of course consists of any milk from animals (soy milk would be allowed), butter, margarine, yogurt, cheese, and ice cream among many others. From what I have read, people who are on a GFCF diet usually need to take vitamin supplements to ensure that they are getting the calcium and nutrients they need, however many vitamins contain either gluten or dairy so we would need to seek out the right vitamins as well. Cooper would be allowed to have most fruits, vegetables, potatoes, rice, and I am not really sure yet what else. Obviously this will take a lot more research before we are ready to take this on, but all the information leads us to believe that it wouldn't be fair to Cooper not to try. It's just hilarious to think about Peter and I having anything to do with a strict, regimented diet. (STRICT?REGIMENTED? I'm not sure I have ever used those words in my entire life. Certainly not pertaining to food!)
So, you can see how all this has had me wallowing in self-pity on the couch with nothing but glutens, dairy products, and google keeping me company. I just needed a moment. But I am back. I truly believe we can do this, and if nothing else Cooper deserves our best efforts. It feels good to have a game plan and to be moving forward. Sure I have some scary thoughts, and I will share those over time. For now though, I am armed with a mother's love for this wonderful little boy and we will do whatever it takes to give him every opportunity possible.
Now, if you'll excuse me, I think I need to go have a bunch of bread and some ice cream. We have to get rid of this stuff . . . for Cooper, of course! :)
Thursday, March 4, 2010
Feeling of the Day
The feeling of the day is . . . . deflated.
Maybe I should call it the feeling of the hour, since my feelings seem to be all over the board at the moment. We finished up at the Vogtareuth clinic on Tuesday. The doctor was great, and we were also joined by one of the therapists (Cooper's favorite one as a matter of fact) for a very lengthy discussion about the results and next steps. And in the end, I just feel deflated.
Wishing things were different. Wishing I didn't feel guilty for wishing that. Wishing I knew all the answers. Wishing I didn't have to ask these questions in the first place. Wishing my German were better so that I could do a better job fighting for Cooper. Wishing I had done more things before now. Wishing my mom were here and that I had some other close people around. Wishing that instead of being so deflated trying to catch tears, I was tackling all the ways that I can be helping Cooper. Wishing I could see into the future.
My head is so full trying to process everything at the moment that I feel like the image you see looking into a funhouse mirror where your forehead is all stretched. I think that Peter and I are both exhausted at the moment, and the irony is that we are only at the beginning of this journey.
We have a long list of things to do now that will take up a lot of our time, and with only 9 weeks (9 WEEKS!!) to go before the next member of our family arrives and Peter's work as busy as ever, there is no time to waste and no rest for the weary. I'll update later with more specific details about the results, but for now we just need time to process and time to figure out what is best for Cooper and for our family.
I am praying for lifted spirits, renewed energy and perserverance for Peter and I, and that things fall into place quickly. And in the midst thanking God for the constant (albeit sometimes painful) reminder through rolls, stretches, and kicks that a healthy baby continues to grow in my belly.
Maybe I should call it the feeling of the hour, since my feelings seem to be all over the board at the moment. We finished up at the Vogtareuth clinic on Tuesday. The doctor was great, and we were also joined by one of the therapists (Cooper's favorite one as a matter of fact) for a very lengthy discussion about the results and next steps. And in the end, I just feel deflated.
Wishing things were different. Wishing I didn't feel guilty for wishing that. Wishing I knew all the answers. Wishing I didn't have to ask these questions in the first place. Wishing my German were better so that I could do a better job fighting for Cooper. Wishing I had done more things before now. Wishing my mom were here and that I had some other close people around. Wishing that instead of being so deflated trying to catch tears, I was tackling all the ways that I can be helping Cooper. Wishing I could see into the future.
My head is so full trying to process everything at the moment that I feel like the image you see looking into a funhouse mirror where your forehead is all stretched. I think that Peter and I are both exhausted at the moment, and the irony is that we are only at the beginning of this journey.
We have a long list of things to do now that will take up a lot of our time, and with only 9 weeks (9 WEEKS!!) to go before the next member of our family arrives and Peter's work as busy as ever, there is no time to waste and no rest for the weary. I'll update later with more specific details about the results, but for now we just need time to process and time to figure out what is best for Cooper and for our family.
I am praying for lifted spirits, renewed energy and perserverance for Peter and I, and that things fall into place quickly. And in the midst thanking God for the constant (albeit sometimes painful) reminder through rolls, stretches, and kicks that a healthy baby continues to grow in my belly.
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